Involving those with lived experience in the development of the Mulberry Bush really matters!
Working at the Mulberry Bush, we always wonder what happened to those we care for and looked after. The relationships formed are powerful, and it is this very power that we hope transforms lives. We know some of our ex-pupils just like to move on, – but it doesn’t take away our yearning to know. And – would it help them to know we still care?
In the lead up to our 70th anniversary in 2018, we grew an ex-pupils’ group on Facebook which now numbers around 150 and is administered by two of our ex-pupils.
I started to get nervous as we approached the 70th anniversary celebration, as the communications coming through the group seemed to be asking or suggesting there was a bigger offer or promise from the Mulberry Bush? Was there some sort of ongoing relationship on the table, – a greater commitment, – were we fostering a dependency we couldn’t meet? My anxiety was about whether we could fulfil the relationship that I felt was being asked for, – were we being fair?
I also knew that the voices, views and opinions of our ex-pupils could really help the charity shape and develop both what it currently does, and its plans for the future.
This led to the formation of the Ex-pupils Advisory Group (EPAG), running now for four or five years and meeting every month.
The creation of the EPAG, is in absolute synergy with the mission of the Bush, which fundamentally is about relationships and reflects the therapeutic community model – a commitment to learning from one another.
It has proved a great collaboration and demonstrates that relationships endure over the years and decades. I am sure this builds the trust and credibility for our work and also demonstrates a transparency and openness to learning. It certainly fosters and creates positive working relationships between ex-pupils, staff and leaders like me.
The EPAG helps demonstrate the relevance and effectiveness of what we do, ensuring that how we do it is aligned with the lived realities rather than our assumptions and the policy initiatives we have to follow. This should make the interventions more effective and so improve outcomes. Its a win win!
So as a demonstration of how much we value them, their voices and their involvement, we are welcoming two members to the trustee’s board meeting in December. This is a step towards having them at the heart of decision making in the charity.
A day we all look forward to is our annual Ex-pupils Open Day.
This year, for the first time it ran on a Saturday, – at the request of the EPAG. It is a day when pupils come back and bring their families, staff and ex-staff are there and the main focus is all the photos from across the decades.
Some ex-pupils come every year and some are returning for the first time. They may have been at the school in the 1950’s, 60’s, 70’s etc or more recent. It is always great to see them again and hear about their journey.
What fascinates me about the day is that so many say “this place is completely different and yet its exactly the same”. We spend the time unpicking this, – the sameness is to do with the feelings, – how people at the charity are with them and their family members. Different is usually to do with the site changes and just how small it seems compared with their memory of it being huge.
One memory this year from a first-time returner from the late 90’s was how far it was to walk to the next-door house. They remember needing to out their roller blades on for the journey. In reality its about 20 metres, -they couldn’t believe it!
It is really important that we don’t underestimate the power of reconnecting with the Bush, – for many it is reconnecting with a painful past. This year, more than one ex-pupil described themselves in disparaging terms, – just remembering the challenging times and the behaviour they displayed at that time that led them to the Bush. Much of the day is about reassuring them that we remember the good times, – the great qualities they had, and the strengths and skills they had and developed. It is also for them about reconnecting with other past pupils and this demonstrates the power of the community that the Bush is.
Here is a YouTube video of our day in 2023:
Over this past year, ex-pupils have shared a number of platforms with members of our staff team at events and conferences. This adds a powerful dimension to our messaging.
At the ex-pupils day this year, Taygen, one of the leaders of EPAG asked others to fill in a questionnaire to help Taygen and I with a conference talk we made in September, entitled ‘Exploring an adventure of living and leading at the Mulberry Bush’.
We asked them;
- What it was like arriving at the Bush?
- Any particular challenges that shaped their story?
- What helped make them resilient / strong?
- What they discovered about themself?
- How did they retain hope?
- When they needed courage to keep going?
- What helped them feel safe?
- What’s it like coming back?
Their responses showed the reflective capacity they had, – an openness and warmth and a willingness to be vulnerable with their answers.
The talk Taygen and I prepared was intended to give a thought provoking and personal experience of both our journeys rather than be too professionalised. Taygen was very open about feeling terrified at the prospect of the talk, and yet completely determined to do it. I am sure many of us have felt those feelings of imposter syndrome, – what have I got to offer, – will they want to listen, – have I got anything interesting to say.
I was aware that I needed to be prepared, in sharing my ‘adventure’, to feel equally vulnerable. I hope I achieved this.
Alongside our personal narratives, to give context and power, we included a short video of how the Bush started, via an interview with the founders daughter and a pupil from the early 50’s, a lovely video of our ex-pupils open day in 2023 (link above), an amazing video of an ex-pupil of the early 2000’s on the importance of feeling safe.
I was aware during the session of the emotional impact it was having on people in the room. There were serious faces, some tears and at the end, a long silence. This reassured me that we had touched the audience and hopefully communicated something of the power of the experience of this work, the power of relationships, and the adventure of living and leading’.
In the following open conference reflective session, a number of people spoke about the impact the session had on them, they spoke to the power of the experience of hearing from someone who had experienced the services that we offer, and what it had meant to them. It had clearly churned people up a bit.
The Broader Relevance – For Society and the Public
I am so aware that in the press and social media the ways the stories that surround the complex lives that the children and families the Mulberry Bush works with so often are told in ways that vilify, demonise, criticise, or shame. The children and families are so often isolated and vulnerable, and the language used doesn’t help. Young children described as ‘street wise’ when they are just the opposite, – vulnerable, fragile, without boundaries. This is why it is so important to find ways to tell their story, – to try and break the cycle they are caught up in.
Ex-pupils or experts by experience are the most powerful voices in telling their story. The authenticity and straight forward explanation, accompanied by a communication of the pain is what helps get the message across. It helps change the narrative from demonising or vilifying or perhaps pity and sympathy to understanding their strength, growth, and the contribution they are making. Really understanding their journey.
Looking Ahead
The way forward for the Mulberry Bush is to work so much more closely with ex-pupils and other experts by experience. To ensure that we are working collaboratively with them, – where a lived experience can truly shape practice locally, regionally and nationally.
We are currently working with the Open University on a pilot research study, which we hope will lead to a longitudinal study on outcomes of children who attended the school. We have two ex-pupils on the research team. Ex-pupils are now involved in the delivery of our staff induction and training, as well as sharing platforms for talks at events and conferences.
I hope in time we will have ex-pupils on the staff team. We can offer them training, and they can help us with all the areas of charity’s work, bringing their strength and knowledge to the fore for social good.
I know that we have lots to learn about this, and it would be great to hear from you about how you are working with experts by experience to lead, manage and shape services for the future.
